We Lost the Baby

It's been a loooong day. I went the doctor (actually, midwife) today, and she confirmed that I had a miscarriage.

It was a shock -- even with the bleeding and low pregnancy hormones, I still thought everything was going to turn out fine. J. and I were both unprepared by it, and we were pretty upset.

After we'd had time to absorb the news, and cry about it, and pray about it, we began to focus on the positives. This wasn't our first pregnancy, and we hadn't been trying for a long time to get pregnant. Also, it happened so early, before the heart started beating and before we got to feel the baby move or see it on ultrasound or anything like that. And we'd had a few days to prepare for it, instead of going in for a routine appointment and learning that the baby had died. Those are all things to be thankful for.

It also helps to know that when you miscarry this early in the pregnancy, it means something went wrong when the baby was forming, and it wouldn't have been able to survive anyway. There's nothing we could have done to cause this OR to prevent it.

Thanks for your prayers and concern. J. and I are both doing pretty good, and the girls took the news well, although naturally they were sad. Like I said, we're counting our blessings and focusing in the reasons to be thankful.